My Story: Brotherhood, Battle, and Brewing Hope
There are some stories you do not plan on telling.
Not because they do not matter, but because they carry weight. They come from places of pressure, wrestling, surrender, healing, and obedience. They come from moments where God starts asking you to step into something bigger than what feels comfortable.
This is part of my story.
Hope Over Coffee did not start with a big plan, a studio, or some polished ministry strategy. It started in 2020, during COVID, with a microphone, a folding table, and a season where God was doing something deeper in me and in my family.
When COVID hit, a lot of people felt the pressure. For some marriages, that season exposed cracks and created distance. But for me and Angi, it had the opposite effect. We were home together. We had time to talk, time to work through things, and time to face some things that had been sitting under the surface for a long time. Around that same season, I had just gotten involved in a discipleship group, and God was already beginning to stir something in me.
Because of work, ministry, and discipleship meetings moving online, I ordered a microphone. At first, it was just practical. I wanted better sound for calls. But people started joking that I sounded like I was on the radio. I started playing around with graphics, logos, and backgrounds. I made a Hope Over Coffee logo and put it behind me on video calls.
And somewhere in the middle of all that, I really believe God whispered something to me:
You are going to use that microphone for more than meetings.
That was exciting and it was also terrifying.
When God Starts With What Is in Your Hand
At the time, I did not fully understand what God was doing. I just knew He was stirring something.
Hope Over Coffee became a place for real conversations. Not perfect conversations. Not polished conversations. Real ones. Stories about faith, redemption, transformation, struggle, marriage, family, and the hope we have in Jesus.
The heart behind it has always been simple: people need to know they are not alone.
We all face struggles. We all have doubts. Sometimes we wonder if anyone really understands what we are going through. But God is always working, even in the darkest moments. That is why Hope Over Coffee exists, to be a reminder that there is hope, and that our stories are proof of what happens when we surrender to Him and allow His grace to transform our lives.
The podcast gave me a place to sit across from people, hear what God had done in their lives, and share those stories with others. Over time, I realized something about how God built me: I find joy in one-on-one conversations. I love sitting with people, getting past the surface, and talking about what really matters.
That is where Hope Over Coffee lives.
Around a table.
In honest conversation.
With Jesus at the center.
The Birth of Steel and Stone
As Hope Over Coffee grew, I started realizing that ministry takes resources. Equipment, software, websites, events, it all costs something. I started thinking about merchandise as a way to help support the podcast. In that process, I came up with the name Steel and Stone.
The name carried meaning for me.
Stone speaks to foundation, being grounded in Christ.
Steel speaks to sharpening, men strengthening one another, challenging one another, and refusing to stay passive.
At first, Steel and Stone was just an idea. A logo. A name sitting on the shelf.
But God had more in mind.
Later, while meeting with a group of men, several churches and men’s groups began talking about doing something together. The idea was simple: bring men together for food, fellowship, competition, worship, and a message. We did not want it to just be one church or one group. We wanted men from different places to gather around the same core truth.
Jesus.
When we needed a name, I mentioned that I had this Steel and Stone logo sitting around. The group liked it, and eventually that idea became connected to what we now call the Valor Rally.
The word “valor” came from the picture of David’s mighty men, men of courage, men ready for battle, men with faces like lions. That image captured something we wanted men to remember: we are called to be men of courage, grounded in Christ, sharpened by brotherhood, and ready for the battles God has placed before us.
The first event was not about building a brand.
It was about being the Church together.
Different churches. Different groups. One core. One King.
Living in the Uncomfortable
One thing I have learned is that God often leads us into uncomfortable places.
Not because He is trying to crush us, but because that is where growth happens. That is where surrender happens. That is where we stop relying on ourselves and start depending on Him.
As Steel and Stone began taking shape, I started sensing that God was leading me into something bigger than one podcast or one event. I began writing out what looked like a ministry plan. It included men’s ministry, women’s events, marriage support, discipleship, and long-term investment in people.
It felt big.
Honestly, it still feels big.
There were moments where I thought, “This is a lot.” I have a regular job. Angi has a regular job. We have a family. We are busy. We are not trying to build something for attention. We just want to help people.
But sometimes God puts something in your heart that you cannot shake.
For me, that burden includes men, marriages, and families.
I believe discipleship should be as natural as breathing, and I believe it should be long-term. Jesus spent years with His disciples, and even after all that time, they still did not fully get it. That tells me discipleship is not just an eight-week class. It is life on life. It is walking with people. It is helping men become who God called them to be.
And when it comes to marriage, Angi and I know that our story can help people.
Not because we have a perfect marriage.
But because we have seen God’s grace.
We have walked through hard things. We have had to fight for each other. We have had to learn vulnerability, communication, forgiveness, and surrender. By God’s grace, we are in a strong place today, not because we avoided the battle, but because God met us in it.
Fighting for Marriage and Family
One of the dreams God has placed in us is to help couples.
We have talked about marriage mediation, marriage support, and creating spaces where couples can learn to communicate, reconnect, and fight for their marriage instead of against each other.
So many couples are hurting. Many do not know how to communicate. Many are carrying wounds they have never dealt with. Many are speaking different languages emotionally and spiritually. They love each other, but they do not know how to get unstuck.
We want to help couples get started.
Maybe that looks like an eight-week kickstart.
Maybe it looks like a retreat.
Maybe it looks like sitting across the table from another couple and saying, “You are not crazy. You are not alone. There is hope.”
I do not know exactly what all of it will look like yet.
But I know the burden is there.
And I know God does not waste a story.
Learning Sonship
A deeper part of my story is the struggle of sonship.
I have wrestled with really understanding God as Father. Not just knowing it theologically, but receiving it personally. I have realized that some of the ways I related to my earthly dad affected the way I saw God. Without meaning to, I projected certain fears, expectations, and wounds onto my Heavenly Father.
That has been a journey.
There have been moments where pressure at work or feelings of failure hit something deeper in me. It was not just about the situation. It touched identity. Performance. People-pleasing. The desire to feel valued. The fear of not measuring up.
I have had to learn that God is not asking me to earn His love.
He is teaching me to receive it.
And one of the ways He has been teaching me sonship is by teaching me fatherhood.
Recently, I felt like God was challenging me to lead my children in a way that would help me understand how He leads me. So Angi and I gathered our kids around the table. I told them that what I was doing was for them, but it was also for me, because I needed to understand more deeply how God watches over me, protects me, leads me, and blesses me.
Then I prayed over Angi, our marriage, and each of our kids.
I blessed them.
I spoke over them.
I reminded them that they are stepping into adulthood, and that my role as their father is shifting. My watch over them is not ending completely, but it is changing. One day, they will leave our home and build homes of their own.
That moment was emotional.
Everybody cried.
And I believe God was in it.
Breaking Chains
Part of why that moment mattered so much is because of what we are trying to break.
I come from a family line touched by divorce. Angi does too. There are patterns that have moved through generations, and we do not want our kids to simply inherit what was handed down.
We want them to know that chains can be broken.
We want them to know they can build marriages and families differently.
Years ago, we took our kids on an intentional trip and asked them to pick out something that represented their future spouse. The girls picked bow ties. Paul picked a necklace. Those items became reminders to pray for the people they would one day marry.
Because we forget.
We are human. We need reminders. We need physical markers that point us back to spiritual truth.
That is part of what we are trying to give our kids, not perfection, but direction. Not a flawless example, but a faithful one. We want them to know that Jesus can redeem what was broken, restore what was damaged, and write a new story.
Why I Keep Saying Yes
When I look back, I can see how God has used so many pieces.
A microphone.
A logo.
A men’s group.
A marriage season.
A counselor’s encouragement.
A burden for discipleship.
A desire to help couples.
A table full of kids crying while their father prays over them.
None of it feels random.
It feels like God has been patiently building something.
I still do not have every answer. I still wrestle. I still get overwhelmed. I still wonder what the next step looks like. But I know this: God keeps inviting me to say yes.
Yes to the uncomfortable.
Yes to honest conversations.
Yes to brotherhood.
Yes to marriage ministry.
Yes to fatherhood.
Yes to helping people find hope.
Hope Over Coffee is more than a podcast to me. Steel and Stone is more than a logo. These are places where God is taking parts of my story and using them to serve others.
And if my story can help one man stop hiding…
If it can help one couple keep fighting…
If it can help one father bless his children…
If it can help one person believe that God is still working…
Then it is worth telling.
Hope Is Still Brewing
My story is still being written.
There are more details, more layers, and more conversations to come. But the thread running through all of it is simple:
God is faithful.
He meets us in the battle.
He gives us brothers for the journey.
He restores marriages.
He teaches us how to be sons and daughters.
He helps us break chains.
And He uses ordinary things, even a microphone and a cup of coffee, to brew hope in places we never expected.
So if you are in a battle right now, do not believe the lie that you are alone.
You are not.
There is hope.
There is grace.
There is healing.
And God is still working.